When I think of you.

There are times in life when you just don’t know what really is going to happen next,you just keep doing things that are totally wrong without even thinking about them or there after effects. When ever I see you I get the same awkward feeling. I call it awkward because I feel numb, I feel like all the miseries and all the joys come at me at once.”I want to talk to you” I scream it inside my mind. My heart skips the beat and I feel like my chest bit more heavier and breath bit more faster. I want to tell you how much to mean to me. My entire world resides around you. I want to see you beside me everytime I open my eyes. Don’t you feel the same when you see me? Don’t you think about wonders happening if we would be together? Don’t you want to don’t all the things that are irrelevant? Don’t you feel happy if we are sitting together or if we talk about our lives? 

I want to let you know how it feels, when everything you ever want is right in front of your eyes and I have to act like I don’t even care. I die to hear your voice,even though I’ve listened to it thousands of times still I want to keep on hearing those words from your pretty face. 

I feel oblivion. I feel left out without you. I feel the silence echoing inside my mind tearing me apart in bits and pieces. I feel soo materialistic when I see you with someone else. Am i that easy to replace? Do I hold such a small place in your big heart that’s open for all the new faces around you? Won’t you ever say those words again ? Won’t you ever talk to me like you did before?

These words I always speak these group of words when our stars collide and we catch hold of each others eyes. I feel like I pull you towards me and say I miss you like anything, but all my fantasies are just mere myths. No matter how much expectations I have in my dreams with you. Reality drags me down and bangs me back on earth where we are soo far away that we aren’t even in each other’s sights. Come to me speak me just don’t leave me.

Saying a goodbye was soo easy for you.

Bet you should have taken the memories with you my dear.💕

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